From the Pastor’s Desk

Dear St. Mary’s Parishioners:

How To Make a Good Confession?

With Fr. Reji being away on vacation for the next few weeks, I thought now would be a good opportunity to offer some helpful tips to make a good confession. We’ll be down to just me in the confessional, so I want to ensure everyone who wants and needs to go has the chance. I’m amazed that many of you take advantage of Christ’s gift of this Sacrament here at St. Marys. There is no sin too big nor too heinous that is beyond God’s mercy. No matter how many times we’ve fallen or keep repeating the same sins over and over, God will always forgive us. We need only to be truly contrite and strive to never do it again. Before walking into a confessional, some prayerful reflection is extremely helpful. If you go online, there are many “Examination of Conscience” available to choose from. The best ones use the Ten Commandments as a template to guide you through a series of questions to help you. Invoke the Holy Spirit before you do so, to help you bring up those areas in your life that are in most need of God’s healing.

Once you’re ready, now it’s time to approach the confessional in the church. You can either choose anonymous (behind the grill) or face to face.  I ask that only one person be in one or the other at a time. I want to ensure that no one else can hear what is being said. After the priest says “In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and the Holy Spirit,” you begin immediately with the traditional format: “Bless me father, for I have sinned. It has been… (now say how long it's been since your last confession). This helps give the priest some context of the penitent’s spiritual state. 

Now begin to say the sins that came up during your reflection. Simply state the kind of sin and how many times it was committed. For example, if you’ve violated the Seventh Commandment of “Thou shall not steal”, simply say, “Father I've stolen from work three times.” Sometimes in this moment, there’s a tendency to share unnecessary details or the frame of mind of the people involved. While it’s laudable to analyze your actions, minimal details are ideal in the confessional. If the priest sees a need to delve deeper, he will probably ask for context in order to help him formulate the proper counsel. As a general rule, keeping the details to a minimum is best. If you need more time with particular issues, a meeting outside of the confessional might be more appropriate. 

Nothing brings more joy to my heart when I see a long line outside of the confessional. It means people are desiring to encounter the mercy of Jesus in a deeper way. If you see this as well, it can be an act of charity to keep the confession concise, in order that everyone has a chance to be cleansed of their sins. I will make similar efforts on my end. As I close, I’m extremely humbled every time you come to me for confession, as a fellow sinner. God’s love never ceases to amaze me. 

Fr. Brian J. Soliven